Day #235 : Last Day In IPG

So here comes the feeling of last day in IPG.
I don't know what to express actually.
I saw my friends took pictures, taking something as 'memory', leaving something, hugging, crying etc.
But i keep silent , laying here in my precious room and bed.
What did i feel actually?
I don't know.
I met Mira - a friend i used to call 'kurus' since 5 years before and we bowed a promise to keep on our shape , or in the other word - not getting fat anymore.
People are waving goodbye(s) but i prefer to locked myself in the room.
I don't want to say goodbye. I don't want anyone notice me here and hug me or say goodbye to me.
I don't want.
I prefer to go silently without anyone notice my presence.
I even plan to hide myself / at least sleep so no one will find me and say goodbye to me...

sigh.

Lot of things happen.
This is the place i grew up.
This is the place i learned a lot - mentally, emotionally, i understood true love then i learned to let go although my heart didn't accept , i learned to smile through circumstance, i get stronger, i was betrayed, i learn to keep living in a harmony etc etc etc....

Now that i finally will leave the place that i really wanted to leave before...
People packed up their things and start moving,
I am still laying with my unpacked things.

This feeling is _)(*&^%$!@#$%^*&()

Sigh. Sigh. Sigh.
I wonder what will bring me in the future.
I wonder how tomorrow will look alike.
I wonder ...

See You All Again.
Thank You IPG Kampus Keningau for helping me to grow up A LOT. REALLY A LOT !!!!!!!

XoXo

Throwback Day #228 : Luasong's Ladies Night

After yesterday's piano lesson, i rushed to Perkasa Hotel for Luasong's Ladies Night Party.

Story & Picture later...

too sleepy. 

ja ne.

XoXo

Day #229 : Collaboration and Judging

My piano teacher asked us (the students) to gather and learn from each other.

One of us was in grade 7.

She'll be taking her exam this November 30, 2013.

So, teacher asked her to play in front of us and judge each of the piece she played.

Well, i was judging from my point of view - i mean, the words i uttered sound like judging but actually i am not. I was telling myself about --- if i was in her place, i should improve in these aspects bla3.

It was fun.

&

I learned a lot tonight.

Thank you teacher.

Someday I'll make myself proud of the change and struggle i made.

#Thesis undone yet . I wonder when will i enjoy the no thesis moment.

XoXo

Day #222 : Final Exam

I officially ended my exams in IPG Kampus Keningau today .
So this is the feeling huh? Throwing my pencil case and shouting happily " Lasssttttt paaaapppperrrrr"

So, to celebrate the final paper, we went to Bunsit River to eat together (Coursemate) . I immersed myself in the river for a long time.

I JUST WANNA FEEL THIS MOMENT ! :)
XoXo

Day #221 : Dad, Someday I will Make You Proud...

Dear dad,
I've been so busy lately that i can't even have a proper time to sleep or eat.
If you're still here, i mean, you still can reply my message, you will be saying a word or sentence to help me to stand strong :)
But dad, I am strong :)

Few weeks before you went to rest for a while, you told me to take a piano class again and i am in now dad. It was my fourth lesson already and seriously the lesson getting more and more difficult. Just now i merely decide not to attend the lesson but your voice spoke loudly encouraging me to attend the class. Even i didn't perform the best performance today but i knew that i gained something important too. I know i can't really concentrate on my lesson today but i knew i have something that i never have if i didn't attend the class.

Dad,
though it's hard and it will always be hard, i will try to enjoy each lesson and bring out the best of me. Someday dad, when we meet again, i will play a lot of pieces for you. I will play along the time until you get bored and i will play a lullaby for you.

Sigh.
It's been a while and i miss you A LOT ! :(
See you soon dad and when we read this together later, we already hug each other, tightly, again. I love you dad.
O ya, your girlfriend @ mum is doing fine.

XoXo

Day #220 : Thesis

... I was in the library all day long, settling my thesis...

... In the end, i was left alone behind, all my batch-mate already get their printed thesis ready, while i am still struggling and doing my best, as best as i can, to achieve my highest might [or to satisfied one's heart?] Or maybe both ...

Just let it be :)

XoXo

Day #219 : Make myself comfortable in prison :)

Well, The prison i mentioned above is beautiful, comfortable and full of love - my house.
I didn't do anything, didn't take a bath in the morning, just took a simple breakfast made by my younger brother and sit all day watching movies.

Mom didn't say anything, she didn't even complained like she always did. She just repeatedly asked me to take my lunch, to drink or at least eat something light.

I didn't go back hostel cause mom asked me so. It was my first time and maybe her first time too, asking me not to go back hostel on time. Probably because she missed us... The only alive treasure she can see and hold on and the alive product of love for her and the man she loved the most.

Mom said : "It was so silent here without dad" and silence attack us for about 20 minutes. I can't answer that, not because i don't want but i don't know what to say. But, yeah, it did mom. But we will go through to this, successfully .

And the night goes through with me sleeping beside mom in their bed. How i miss dad to come and put the blanket on me while i am half asleep and sometime fake my sleep.

Sigh
XoXo

Day #218 : Happy Birthday Welder

Welder, my only brother turn to 12 today. He was asking me to bake a cake but i didn't have all the ingredients. Luckily, Gyrle suggest a simple but delicious cake. So i baked the Batik Cake.. I wonder how it will be taste but i hope it'll fine. :)

Happy birthday dear brother. I Love You more than what you know. :)

A little message from Redeeming Love : a woman is either a door or a wall.
Because for some of us, one miles can be farther to walk than thirty.

It all come to my mind and i started to agree with everything. Now i know why my sister really wants me to read this book - Redeeming Love.

Day #217 : Redeeming Love

I jumped in happiness when i get rhe package from Germany. I can't wait to read it - Redeeming Love, even the dedication thrill me.

Inside the package too, a beautiful and cute letter of Stacy's family and her birdie, a Germany clock tower and a beautiful Flower's photograph.

I am so happy that i cried. I am really happy.

Day #216 : Fishing

I've been waiting for the day when i can stare at the water, waiting for the fish to eat the bait and i pull them up. So yesterday after taking my second last exam paper, i joined the Fishing Group in Bunsit :)

I doesn't have my own fishing rod yet but i was quite enjoying the moment. What more than finally get into your dreams right ? :)

It was a big big day for me .

Thank you friends for letting me join the team :) Hontoni Arigato ! :)

***** I wonder what kind of journey i will encounter next ! Can't wait ! *****

XoXo

Throwback Day #206 : The end of the beginning

This might be the last program for me as the chairman.

I still can't believe that i am about to end the journey.

Thank you friends and all the committee who work hard for this party :)

Selamat menjadi cikgu, see u out there ! Let's bring the world to successful life just the way they want to be :)

Mr. Camera

XoXo