FUTURE

I ended a year full of blessings diary on April 06, 2014 :)

I had an unsettle thing in my heart over the year. A feeling like I am not in a position or place where I should be. I supposed to not to lose things I love and maybe where I stay isn't a place I supposed to be ... but no answer have came and feeling still looms.

But... when i remind myself every morning, through the thick and thin, through the hard days and good days, the unsettle feeling gone.

A year full of hope, challenges, happiness, sadness, struggle and so on.

So this year, i am no longer a jobless woman. I added one precious journey and stage in my life. I've been busy. So busy. I even have a little time to do things i always do , like photographing , playing music etc. I sometimes have to yell to the kids i teach, sometimes more than i should. I live alone in a quarters, I have to wake up early in the morning, I have to face different kind of people in a different situation.

But i loved the changes. I find that it's best to find joy in the imperfections. Even if there are some holes missing, i feel joy in all of this. Every day when i wake up, i look around, and see that God has placed a blessing in my life. And knowing that i am on His journey for my life has been the most rewarding feeling i have ever felt in my faith, despite all of the things are still missing.

Exhausted, lonely heart is full of joy ! :) 

XoXo

Day #344 : A door.

There's a quote saying "When one door closed another door opening. But often we stay too long in front of the closed door and we didn't realize that another doors opened for us.
Speaking about door, it reminds me about opportunity. Everyone went through beautiful moments. There are things that will last in a very long time, forever or maybe in a very short time. If we are enjoying the opportunity either it happened in a very short or long way, we will be long for 'that' time when the door close.
Ok, here is the fact. Door closed, opportunity change. But how many of us willing to change in a very short time to enter another door? Think about this.
My friend Tico once told me that Life is an open door. You're a door, others are doors too. I agreed. Cause , When you let someone in, you open your door to them. When you don't want the person to come in, close the door. People who really want to come in will wait outside until you open yourself for them.
It is just the same for the others too. When you decided to come in, the others may open or close. When they open, you enter. Here is the IMPORTANT thing that i want to remind myself today. Remember, when others open the door for you, you might like or dislike what inside. The 'like' will make you stay and 'dislike' will make you wanna leave.
Sometimes, you may have both feelings inside you. So i know i am experiencing them now. Tico said, open up! Be kind to others! Don't cose yourself!
Now i think i walk inside someone's door, that made me feel both way. So, many point made me plan to stay. But some of them pointed me to leave the door. And the 'some of them' really suffocate me and need me to leave for some fresh air. The problem is , am i willing to leave or not?
So today, i'm telling myself these :
1. Let go of something you can't change. Let go means, go away and never hold on anymore.
2. Sometime, something that will make you free is the one that made u afraid to change.

Anyways, i still have a lot of time to think. In a mean time, i will just stay freely, never expect anything and when the courage is enough, i'll open the door and get out and close it.
I just don't want to change what inside the door. I want to see how much will i endure everything, then if i can't hold on anymore, i will just go.

I Have Something To Show You #5 : Double B LOVE Story . Badd + Bea :)

Last week i spent my weekend with my best friend, Beatress Elisabeth , yes a beautiful name for a beautiful owner :) . We plan on doing a couple photoshoot few weeks before and we finally did it.

It was a beautiful time to spend with another amazing photographers and of course time alone with her, talking and sharing like there's no tomorrow.

In short, I enjoyed my weekend. 

What a great time to run away from hectic emotional and mentally ... emm... problem? no. I don't know. 

Anyway, here's some of the photo. 

Beautiful scenery. Beautiful person.

Enjoy.

XoXo

I Have Something To Show You #4 : Annette Shizu . My Fav Model

XoXo

I Have Something To Show You #3 : Happy Valentine Day !

A beautiful place with a beautiful couple :)

XoXo

Day #300 : Good Morning, Rise and Shine !

A day started with Amsal 22 and a deep prayer. I thank you Lord for giving me a chance to live once again and to start all over again !

I am thankful that i knew Annette Shizu, such a charming, talented, beautiful, etc lady !

The first session and still counting :)

XoXo

Day #299 : Butterfly in my tummy ~

All i want to say is :

Look at me, 
I will never pass for a perfect bride, or a perfect daughter. 
Can it be, I'm not meant to play this part? 
Now I see, that if I were truly to be myself. 
I would break my fam'ly's heart.
Who is that girl Isee? 
Staring straight back at me? 
Why is my reflection someone I don't know? 
Some how I cannot hide, 
Who I am. 
Though I've tried. 
When will my reflection show? 
Who I am? 
Inside?
When will my reflection show, who I am, 
inside? 

XoXo

Day #295 : Now i am sure that although you left me, you're still here with me.

Yesterday, i remember me walking in the rain from the place i stay to Keningau Music Class. Pink gown and vintage sandal. It was freaking cold and i was late for class. So, we began with O Sole Mio song and i totally captivated by songs in Am and Dm. Beautiful music and harmonic it was !

Then come the hardest part. Teacher asked me to choose either may or Nov to take examination. Because i made an important plan this november so i need to choose May, which i think i don't have enough time to settle everything. Teacher ask me to play swings and dance steps instead of the romantic melodies, that too is hard cause i am not into swings , jazz etc . For such a long time, i only play romantic, simple marching and sometimes loving waltz. Sure it made me worried sick. I am not sure either i can master all 3 pieces till May.

So, last night i fall asleep in weary. Then i received a letter together with a bunch of roses. The letter said "...Oyo, so you're finally performing piano songs which i am looking forward before. Now that i can't see you perform live, i give u this roses. I know its too much. But each time you perform, take one rose and perform beautifully. Don't take too much..." the letter was long but i can't remember the rest. And the only person who call and write ...0yo to me is dady.

This morning i was awake and i shed tears. I am looking for dady in all things but he didn't appear before me and last night he appeared in my dream. I know God told me through bible that the death won't know anything like the alive person. I know it wasn't dady but i know if dady still alive he will say such things too and even appear in the crowd to watch the perfomance. I know that God let me dreamt that dream because He knew what i need the most!

I woke up in the morning and start with the 'Sea Bird'. Still out of tempo and lack in pedaling but soon i know i'll master that. And for the swing and dance step song, it was quite nice and i only tried the treble clef. Baby step right?

Ahhhh, it feels so good to read dad's letter i am now in the mood of performing again. Well, i can't wait to see the result in May.

Thank You dear God. I know u understand me the most!!!!!!!

Day #293 : I've been waiting for so long, thought you'll come along.

Rather than locking myself in a room, i visited my Jerry, a friend who currently working in AVA Studio. 

While pushing and pulling him to be a model, he finally came with idea to ask Adie a.k.a Lisa to be a model this evening. Luckily Adie didn't say much and accept the request. 

So we choose a bride outfit and i do a little make over to her and tadaaa... here she is.

Because Jerry refuse to be the groom , so i think this photos are more to lonely bride, perhaps waiting for the dear soul mate who doesn't come, but she wait and wait and wait.

What say you? 

*This is my first time doing studio shooting and sure, there's a lot of weaknesses here. So, you're so invited to utter your thought about these photos. ENJOY*

Love,

Waratte Photography . cyeka

ups, i forgot to mention. I had a chance to wear those beautiful wedding dress too ! Thanks Jerry ! :)

XoXo

Throwback day #290 : Uke' O

There's no ego when you're an ukulele player ~ Jake Shimabukuro

In short, they're all awesome ! 

Thank you for the experience Uke' O!

XoXo

Throwback Day #258 : Stewardlee + Lina Len . Wedding Day

Loving someone is a leap of faith. You are giving them your heart and trusting them not to break it. No matter what happens, I will still never regret making that leap for you.
~unknown~

So my cousin Lina choose December 18, 2013 as their date of wedding. Early in the morning, Waratte team went to her house and began capturing and recording her very meaningful moments. 

Peach color and lot of flower can be seen that day. What a blissful memories. I am touched. Not only by the love they showed me but the memories i got from every one especially that one special person who sacrificed a lot of time just to help Lina on her wedding day. 

The wedding went well, and we all went home with a happy heart. 

Thank God !

Mr & Mrs Stewerdlee, congratulation on your wedding. May the Lord bless and keep you. 

Love,
Waratte Photography.

XoXo